Reviewing Sonos, or “I want to build a stereo system out of Lego and I have too much cash!”

Reviewing the Sonos is overdue. I’ve had a Sonos system since early 2013 and, well, I know reviews are supposed to tease you all the way to the end of the many thousands of words I’m writing for free…

…the long and the short of it is that Sonos is freakin’ awesome and if you can afford to buy into it you should.

Bear in mind this isn’t so much of a proper review as it is an embarrassing admission to how many of these things I ended up buying.

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Part 3 – Building Your Storefront

This is the final step of my 3 part (and one introduction) series on setting up your own shop of digital short fiction. It’s much shorter and easier than the other parts. You’ll need the links to your products that were generated by FetchApp in the previous step.

A thing to bear in mind

This is the $0-dollars-invested version of setting up your own shop. I’m sure there are much better (read: much shoppier) ways to set up your digital shop, but I don’t think there is a better way to do it for free. I’m aiming my cost/benefit analysis at what I think is an optimistic estimate of at most  $5 of sales a month, until you start making a bit of a name for yourself. So anything that costs you more than $5/month is going to be a money sink, in my opinion.

So this is my $0 solution.

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I love Hue – A Requirements Specification (Addendum to the Hue Review)

[Update Feb 15, 2014: As time has progressed most of this specification is now redundant. The Hue doesn’t yet manage animations on the Bridge, and I’m not sure it will in the near future, but the rest of it is pretty thorough. I’ll leave this article up for historical purposes, but beware it’s mostly redundant now]

[Update Late 2013: I’ve been poking through the Hue API and it seems a lot of this is possible through the 1.1 version of the API. I will be investigating and seeing if I can make my own controller app]

After writing my extensive Hue review, I couldn’t help but think of what I wanted out of my system, so I came up with this list.

This is a public list of requirements for a useful Hue system. Any developers are welcome to take this list and use it as a feature set checklist for any program they are developing to control the Hue. If you do, and you find this list helpful, it would be nice if you acknowledged my contribution somewhere. Also, if you develop anything that does the majority of these things, please let me know so that I can GIVE YOU MY FUCKING MONEY.

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[Fiction] Diary Found in an Empty Fridge

Work enjoys sending out interesting Friday afternoon ‘clean the fridge’ reminders. This week I offered to write something in the style of H.P. Lovecraft, and the marketing department styled it up on fake paper. I share it here for your enjoyment. There is a longer version but the essence is contained within. Read on and enjoy this light farce.



Diary Found in an Empty Fridge


Dear diary, I realise I may never return to my loved ones in my quest for the Lost Lunch. Legend has it that it lies somewhere in the Metroplex fridges.  God only knows what indescribable items that were once food I may find on my journey. May He have mercy on my soul.


I camped by the fridges last night. My sleep was undisturbed, thankfully. I fear though that something broke free in the night. There is a strange smell in my encampment, a faint smear on the ground that might be Thai green curry. Had something seen me? I could discern nothing out of place amidst the bedewed milk bottles and plastic bags.


It happened again last night. I tried to stay awake, but I drifted off and woke with more tracks about me. Something is growing inside those containers. No sightings of Lost Lunch so far.


I forget why I came here. I fear I am going mad.


I woke tonight and found myself standing as if in a trance in front of the larger fridge, door open. My arms were stretched into that treacherous forest of bags and containers and then I felt myself stepping forward!

It has become too much. I am packing my encampment up. There is something in here, something mouldy and ancient and … the smells cloud my judgement.

I will gird myself this afternoon and clear it out, every last bag and container, righteous or corrupt, owned or abandoned. I leave only this diary as a warning for future generations.

Don’t mourn me. The corruption growing inside these fridges will be gone, once and for all, by 4:30pm.

The Crack – March 20

The Crack


You take a breath
and feel it all,
bundled up inside
So push the emotions into a ball,
and take another
breath, don’t stall;
Now breathe it out,
evaporate, and
get it out.


I was getting stressed about random projects and life and did some breathing exercises to chill out, and out came this poem, too. Free poem! Win!